Sunday, January 20, 2013

Fantastical



I remember watching a British documentary once, years ago. It was about sex. They were interviewing men and women about their fantasies. They edited all the men together and one after one, they said the same thing: two women at one time. Threesome. No description or detail. Just the simple repetition. Two women at once. It was as if for them, just multiplying tits and ass by two was the ultimate turn on. More is better. Crass and direct. Boring.

The women however were dirty. Really really dirty. Dirty and specific. Dirty and creative. Dirty and downright kinky. One fantasized about apparatus, machines, and equipment and ways to be restrained. Another thought about animals, dogs and ponies. Another wanted to take control, having a man kneel before her and paint her toenails. And then there were the aliens...

I was talking about this with some friends, and we began to describe our own fantasy lives. We all agreed we had worlds. Not flashes or images, but narratives, details and repeated scenes that we would go over and over again until perfected. Personally, I have an island. I visit that island and replay scenarios. Chase scenes, auctions, and public displays. It's my world.

My favourite story is from a lesbian friend of mine. She had this fantasy that involved a power station. In her fantasy it is her orgasms that fuel the electricity. She would be in the station and people would have to make her come over and over again so that the energy would be generated. She said it made her feel so powerful. I loved the image. A city illuminated by her come.

I have had partners ask me what my fantasies are. I think in hope that they can fulfill them in some way. It is rare that I reveal the details. For one, they could never do to me the things I imagine. I think that is the point of the imagination. To go to the impossible. It is so limitless. I am not ashamed of my dirty world, it just belongs to me. I am in it's centre, the most desired, the most insatiable, the most irresistible. It feels like home, however, where calm sleep follows.

So two women you say? Imagination please. What are they wearing? How do they smell? What do they say to me as they take control? I need details please. I need impossibilities. It is a fantasy after all and that is the point.